asgardmeridiem | [Closed] One, two, three, not only you and me.

[ Johan sifts through the bag that is slung over his shoulder for a brief moment, adjusting so it's now more in front of his body than resting at his side. ]

I think talking to him helps him. He probably can't express it, Nakama. But no one wants to just be used for their services.

[ Still rummaging. ]

[She stands back politely, waiting to see what'll happen. Is Johan going to offer him a cookie? No, that's silly, but she can't think of what else he could be doing.

She also feels a bit guilty for just stepping into the cart last time without saying anything to him. Johan really is thoughtful when it comes to these grey people.]

I never thought of it before...

Don't feel bad.

[ He holds out a notebook and a pen to the faceless man, who doesn't react much to it. So Johan clips the pen by its cap to the notebook, and drops it in the man's lap. ]

I'll come back for this in three days. I hope you've written something in it. Anything about yourself.

[ He looks back at Nakama and walks over to the cart, settling himself in beside her. ]

No, I should've thought of it. [Sitting with her hands folded in her lap as the carriage pulls out.] I've been invisible before. How many people might've thought I just didn't want anyone to talk to me?

[She glances over at him, helpless.]

It's hard to learn from your own life, isn't it? It's so much easier to learn from what you see other people do. But that's not the important part.

[ He meets her eyes, reassuring. ]

We don't want to be a bother to anybody. Sometimes, we do what we can to avoid discomfort. There's nothing initially wrong with that, not at all.

[ His look turns more sympathetic, now, as he rests his one elbow on the edge of the cart. ]

Being ignored is a terrible thing, but being noticed for something that makes you different than everybody else can be just as terrible. [ He shifts, situating the bag at his feet in the cart now. ]
It's natural that you'd want to avoid troubling situations like that. I think you've learned a lot from your life. [ He looks at the trees, slowly beginning to pass them by. ] It unfurls very slowly, through small awakenings. You're reminded of words you were once told, or a feeling you once had.

"Oh, I get it now." "Oh, that was what they meant."

[It's uncanny, how much he understands about her. That statement about being different, and how much harder that can be... and about how things come back to you, like Anko's words haunting her so often -

- then it hits her. It might not be uncanny - it might be his power. People from Loki can have telepathy.

She gives him a sidelong glance, working hard to keep all suspicion out of it. She doesn't want to believe it of Johan, but Namine did say to keep her eyes open...]

Johan, what power did you get?

[ Johan is suddenly quiet at that. Immediately, he recognizes the unease behind that question, and the implications of what Nakama is afraid of him saying. His brow furrows a bit, smile flickering out into something more dim and disappointed. ]

You don't trust me? [ His eyes stay on the passing scenery. ]

I want to! [Earnestly, almost desperately.] You've been a great friend already, and you understand me so well, but... no one has ever understood me that well, not even my mom. You say things, and I just wonder how you know...

...it could just be a coincidence. But I have to be sure.

... [ Nakama will now feel a tugging at the bag of cookies in her hand. It's strong enough that it feels as if someone -- or something, is pulling at the bag. Johan looks at her as this occurs with an expression that seems harder to read, appearing neutral enough to receive any projection of insecurities or idealization reflected in him. Perhaps it's a displeased look, or even a slighted one. ]

[... oh.

She bends her own power toward it, just to be sure, and the bag of cookies pops out of her hands and hovers in the air for a moment before she snatches it back. Oh, now she feels terrible. She looks out her side of the carriage, trying to hide her utter misery.]

Johan... I'm - I'm sorry...

[Will he hate her now? Is this the end of their friendship?]

[ His words start the moment she gets the "sorry" in, spoken softly. ]

You're sorry, I know. It could have been very likely that I possessed the power you were so uncomfortable with me having. But that still wouldn't mean that I used it on you, would it?

[ When he turns, adjusting to face her more, he naturally gets a bit closer. But just a bit. ]

I wonder, would you have avoided me after? Mistrusted me? Is it because of Loki?

Edited 2012-01-25 09:53 (UTC)

[She turns to face him, and almost jumps when she realizes he's gotten closer, but manages to control herself.]

I... I don't know... these powers, they're all just so new to me. I don't really get them, and... I mean, someone reading your mind, the idea is scary. Never having any secrets. I don't know what I'd do.

But... I don't believe the houses determine what kind of person you are. People will say there are good houses, like Heimdall or Sigyn, and bad houses, like Hel or Loki, but - one of my best friends is from Hel house, and he's sworn to use his power for good. What matters is what kind of person you are, not what power you get.

[After this speech, she swallows heavily and meets his eye, looking solemn.] I - I trust you.

[ Johan listens to Nakama, giving her his undivided attention and showing that he thinks what she has to say is important. There is no preconceived notion that he already knows what she has to say here, and his look turns increasingly understanding. Hel and Loki. ]

I trust you, too.

[ His smile is welcomed back into the conversation at this exchange. ]

Those without secrets owe it to a lucky life, not to an extraordinary sense of honesty. It's important to protect our secrets.

[ He places a hand, very lightly, on Nakama's shoulder for a gentle pat. He doesn't rest it there, for the sake of her comfort. ]

Hold on to those beliefs. Things might happen that will make you want to fall into a habit of mistrust, but it is a game it seems the Gods are willing to try and get us all to play.

[That hand still makes her blush a little, but it's only because she's so unused to male physical contact. Without a father around, and with the boys in her class mostly ignoring her, where would she have gotten it from?]

Yeah. I'm the one who wants us all to work together, but I still let myself fall into that habit of mistrusting certain houses sometimes. It's not right. [Grimly.] You're right. I have to work harder.

I wouldn't want anyone to read my mind, either. [ A chilled breeze rushes them as the eight-legged horses go over a tiny bridge that bows across the frozen lake, turning to get to the halfway point of a full circle around. ]

People can use things that you can't help against you.

[She pulls her cloak closer around her, feeling both the physical and an internal chill.]

I guess it'll be hard, living in Loki. [A sympathetic look.] You'll never know who could be finding those kinds of things out, at any time.

[ His shoulders shrug up and his smile widens for a moment, a given of silent laughter that catches in his throat. He looks at Nakama with an alleviating sway to his eyes. ]

I'm betting everyone will be paranoid of somebody else trying the very same thing on them. People will use their powers to try and make sure someone else hasn't used it on them, or to get revenge if they feel they have been violated. Something small like that can snowball into something ...awful, after all.

[ He reaches down to his bag as he speaks, partially pulling out a blanket that he brought, holding it up in a small gesture, but ready to put it back if Nakama refuses. ]

Unfortunately, there's not much you can do about it a situation like that. There will always be untrustworthy people out there. But you can't let your fear of them control your life.

That sounds - terrible. A whole house at war. I hope nothing like that happens.

[Now the chill she feels won't be alleviated by a blanket, but she still smiles softly at the offer.]

Thanks, Johan. That's really thoughtful of you. [She accpets it and spreads a bit over her own lap, then looks at him, blushing a little - it's very intimate to offer to share it with him, but she can't just ignore him there, possibly just as cold.]

[ Silent at her gratitude, but wearing an acknowledging smile, Johan folds his hands to rest in his lap. He appears to be not picking up on Nakama's conflict about the blanket and their proximity. ]

Are the other animals at this place mutated in such a way?

[When he makes no signal, she just lays the blanket out on her lap, but with lots of room for him to accept some if he's cold. It's not inappropriate if she makes the silent offer, right?]

Mutated? [He has some dark thoughts sometimes, she thinks curiously.] Do you think they're mutated? I just thought they must come from a world where it's normal.

I suppose that depends on whether or not the other animals are similar. [ He looks ahead at the horses as he engages her in conversation, as he smiles with an expression of the most subtle pity. ]

Don't you think this world has some horrible secrets? I come from a world that does this sort of thing all the time. Why not this one? [ He looks over to Nakama again. ]

Edited 2012-01-27 21:06 (UTC)

Well, most of the other animals... no, all of the ones in the petting zoo are normal. [She hugs herself a little, looking at the horses in a whole new way.] That's... animals are the way they are for a reason. You shouldn't play with that. What if it hurts them to have those extra legs?

It probably comes with quite a few health complications. [ Though, in a place like this, it could always just be from magic. Johan pretends not to notice how uncomfortable the implications are making Nakama. ]

I have a rather serious question for you. You may answer it, or you may not. After all, we don't know who could be listening.

[She's grateful for the distraction, but even being asked if she can be asked a serious question makes her a bit nervous. He seems to be in a darker mood today, and there's no way of knowing what he could ask.]

Okay. Sure.

Do you think the Gods here truly care about their people?

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typos at 5 am rofl

still up or just up? =O

Still up....but not after this! zzzz.

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