asgardmeridiem | [Closed] The way that we live...

Entry tags:

data!roxas,
roxas

[Closed] The way that we live...

Who: ???

faints
What: Roxas has more problems bothering him, and ??? out for a stroll during the night.
When: Backdated to Day 54
Where: Gefion Park
Rating: PG

[Flower gardens are probably the last place anyone would expect some dark figure to be roaming through. Good thing it's night though, and the only thing giving his position away is the moonlight as he walks down one of the well-kept pathways. The only point ???'s there at all is to create a more detailed map in his database rather than rely on a piece of paper to help him navigate.

It's not like his room had become too stuffy and dull for him and that he's been lost in thought a few times...but the new, outside stimulus is nice.

However, even if he was calculating and reexamining files and memories during his walk, he wasn't completely off-guard. He would always be alert for any signs of other people approaching.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Nope, can't do that just yet~

But the mention of Sora...already has ???'s suspicions up that he's been blabbering about things he shouldn't again.]

Was it really so bad? I thought you wanted to meet him.

It was a mistake. [ Which is about all he really wants to say on the subject but it's easy to tell how upsetting it is to him--his lips are already pursed and there's a lump in his throat. ]

Why? What happened?

[Just watching Roxas seems to tell him all he needs though, and the memories in his database are adding to his sympathy and irritation.]

I don't want to talk about it.

So you want me to figure it out through the dreams instead?

No, but I just--I'm sick of them! These memories, the dreams, all these people I should know but don't...

Then what do you want to do? I told you before-- just forget about them. Why are you even listening to everyone else if you'll just hurt in the end?

.... [ Because it's not that easy for him--not when he knows people are keeping secrets, when Sora's told him everything--he just can't get it out of his head anymore. All he can manage is a whisper the next time he speaks ]

What if...they're right about me?

[They are right about you.

It's painful to hear it and the fact that he's thinking it too. He won't bring himself to type it though.]

Do you want them to be right?

...I don't know. How could they be? I've spent my whole life in Twilight Town and what he--what Sora said is impossible. Isn't it?

How should I know? I don't know what he said, and you don't want to talk about it.

You can show me though.

[And he extends his hand towards Roxas, as if to initiate a handshake.]

....Show you? [ He stares at the outstretched hand, confused. But he does reach out anyway on autopilot! ]

[Once Roxas takes his hand, ???'s grip tightens so that his original can't pull away. The telepathic line connects, and he's quick to inject his thoughts before a fuss could be made.]

Remember the scene. What did Sora say to you?

[ Oh god what is this. There's a voice in his head just as clear as his own when he thinks and for a second he blanks on what's happening. But then he recalls exactly what happened and unconsciously tries to shift back from the memories themselves.

He's in the hospital room again; things are fuzzy but Sora's voice cuts through with startling clarity and the scene plays out just as he remembers it. But included with that is not only his feelings from then, but now--gut-wrenching anxiety, denial, immense sadness, fear; and doubt. Because as soon as the Sora in his memories says "you were born from me" Roxas' mind loops back and hastily whips through each and every memory Namine's implanted in him in order to deny what he's heard. And it keeps doing that, jumping around erratically. ]

[The jumps back and forth between his encounter with Sora and the fake memories are a bit sickening, but it's interesting to see that Roxas is still stuck on what he believes is the past. He's so familiar with the whole routine, though. The fear, the anxiety, and all the emotions ??? knows firsthand that will establish themselves in the future aren't at their highest potential...But, they're close.

Close enough that ??? decides he needs to clean up the mess. It's the doubt that's the key, the verge of acceptance, and a very real threat.

When the memories run through the loop again, he decides to interfere their course this time and focus Roxas' mind on the fake memories:]

Think of home. Your friends. Twilight Town. Ice cream on the clock tower. Summer vacation.

[ He does so willingly and without any fight at all because it's those memories that he wants to hold onto. Those are the ones he wants to hold in his heart as real, the ones he wants to believe in. Searching for the photo thief, enjoying ice cream on the Tower and running around and facing off with Seifer's gang...

All his important memories, fake though they may be, take on a less erratic path and stick around longer. Bits and pieces play out and then skip, but it's nowhere near as chaotic as the frantic loop from before, and eventually it lingers on a day like any other; just them at the Usual Spot, laughing over one of Pence's obsessions and Heyner's temper. Olette's quiet but knowing and insistent glances to get Roxas to speak up...this is what he wants to be real. Moments like these.

Heyner...Pence...Olette... ]

[Good, good. Roxas is following along just the way he wants him to, and it gives ??? enough time to begin his...alterations on the encounter with Sora as Roxas reminisces. He doesn't need to watch those memories play, so he tunes Roxas out as he works quickly. It's a tricky procedure, one he's not quite sure will work, but he estimates Roxas' restart of the loop and quickly injects the new memories of Sora's explanation in time to obscure the real experience.

The feedback is the same, except Sora's voice isn't as clear as it should, soon fading at the end as Roxas grows more upset. Everything that would have caused the pain and confusion has been censored now, purposely faded like a bad memory. But he doesn't want Roxas' mind to linger and figure out what's missing, so he prompts a few more reminders to return him to the fake Twilight Town memories.]

The sunsets. Struggle tournament. Hayner, Pence, Olette. Remember them.

[ It's a virtually seamless transition that leaves Roxas almost oblivious. Some part of him feels different, muddled...but then the prompting is back and he recalls the moment he and Hayner promised to win the tournament and take home the trophy together. The memories draw him in easily. ]

[With no signs of awareness or mental struggle, ??? continues to prompt the loop, inject the altered memory again, and cue the fake ones as a distraction. He does it a few more times, just to make sure the true memory would be hidden well enough before he ends with one more prompt.]

You are who you are. Never forget that.

[Finally, he releases his grip on Roxas' hand and begins typing:]

You miss your friends, huh?

[ It takes him a minute to respond. By the time ??? pulls back his thoughts are still muddled and cloudy-feeling but the ache in his chest and throat isn't so bad. It's the sort of feeling you get after worrying endlessly...only to be unable to recall what upset you in the first place about something. It's again the blinking on his bracelet that snaps him out of it and he blinks rapidly, reading the messahe before replying slowly ]

Um...yeah. Yeah, I do.

It makes sense. You'll see them again soon though. We can't be stuck here forever.

[...And so far, it seems like the procedure has succeeded and taken root despite it being a temporary fix.]

But what about the war? [ It's doing pretty well; the only off-thing he does is wipe at one eye slightly, a remnant from his earlier mood. ]

Maybe this place can get its color back before a real war breaks out.

If it does start, are you going to fight?

Well I don't know if I'm that good but I spoke to someone about getting lessons so I could help at least.

That's good. Might as well be prepared, right?

Have you found out what your power is yet? Maybe you can use that to your advantage. [BECAUSE HE'S DYING TO KNOW TOO.]

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